Warlords
February 28, 2009 at 6:53 am (Feedback Received, Introspection, Leadership, Musings, Social Networking, change) (actions, authority, change, churched, communication, compromise, conversation, criticism, direction, dreams, excellence, expectations, ideas, ignorance, Isolation, leaders, Leadership, mediocrity, motives, people, power, relationships, religiosity, struggle, vision)
I was listening to an interview with a NYT reporter who had spent some time in Afghanistan. He talked about the chaos and the violence. He talked about the tribes and the warlords. It was quite interesting, to hear from someone who has walked in the streets of a place so war torn.
Fresh Air from WHYY, February 25, 2009 · New York Times foreign correspondent Dexter Filkins reports that the Taliban are waging an increasingly aggressive campaign in Afghanistan — a fact evidenced by a 40 percent increase in Afghan civilian deaths in 2008.
Filkins said that Afghanistan is now the leading producer of opium in the world. He said that the president of the country is really no more than the mayor of Kabul. The warlords and tribes have taken over the country. They have established “cooperative” agreements with one another – a sort of, let bygones be bygones arrangement. However, the US and allied forces have become their common enemy. They work together to push back against the invading army.
The one thing I found fascinating was the religious zeal of the Taliban. Here is a group of religious conservatives. They hold strongly to the laws of Islam, but at the same time are unkind, vindictive, and killing others. They produce opium to support their armies, and they are oppressive to women, children, and anyone they deem to be against them. I can’t seem to wrap my mind around this.
It was at this point that I had an epiphany. In many ways, church is like Afghanistan. We have thought leaders, people of influence, who have gathered their own tribe (clique?) around them. Some have great influence and others have very little. Some are well respected, while some are shown respect, but in reality have little political capital. These thought leaders have, over time, learned to cooperate and not encroach on other’s territory.
One of these church elders told me, “Well, [he] and I don’t see eye-to-eye, but we’ve learned to get along.” Another told me, “I don’t really trust [him], but we’re good friends.” And still another told me, “Ever since he [did this], I will never trust him again. But we get along great!”
Coming in as a relative new comer, I can feel the tension. Everyone acts as if they are great friends, but in reality, they have just learned to operate with informal treaties. These leaders have their own cliques and they rarely steal followers from another. Some are based on philosophy, some on theology, some on cultural differences, and some on a mutual survival strategy. But each little tribe is very aware of loyalty issues surrounding the various members.
It’s all handled in an outwardly fun display of good humor, but there are obvious pressures put on tribal members to conform, cooperate, and pick a team. Those that wander from tribe to tribe are seen as spies. Those that have not chosen a tribe are viewed as losers. Those that are faithful to the tribal leader are given much power and respect within the group.
Some tribes are family oriented, with a matriarch or patriarch. These family groups are seen as benign and without the political moxy to influence the greater church. Some groups center around socio-economic social commonalities. But common to all the groups is the safety in numbers, herding instinct.
What really saddens me is that the majority of the church is not in a tribe. They are a loose collection of people. Some too wounded to belong, some too broken to get up out of the pit they’re in, others are too independent to submit to another’s leadership, and still others are so discouraged and disenfranchised to even care about the workings of others. What saddens me about all of this is the relative indifference shown by the various tribes and their leaders. There seems to be no attempts to be inclusive and to embrace the so-called “losers.”
Until the tribes learn to work through their differences, prayerfully, biblically, and with great grace and love, I don’t see a solution. Their pride keeps them from repenting, and their fear keeps them from letting go of the pride.
As an outsider who has come in to unify the church, breakdown the barriers to growth, and seek better outreach and service opportunities in the community, I am often viewed as the evil invader – and a likely target that helps the tribes to have a common goal.
Is this the Destiny You Want for your Kids?
February 23, 2009 at 4:47 pm (Feedback Received, Introspection, Leadership, Musings, change) (acceptance, actions, authority, battle, change, children, Christianity, churched, communication, community, conversation, criticism, crucial, David, destiny, direction, dreams, excellence, expectations, Goliath, growth, hope, hopelessness, ideas, Isolation, kids, Leadership, mediocrity, opportunity, people, Philistines, post-christian, power, relationships, religiosity, Samuel, shattered, struggle, transformation, unchurched, vision)
For the past couple of weeks I’ve been contemplating my role as a spiritual leader. If they don’t want me to be a prophet, a priest, or an apostle, what is my role? I already know that I’ve not been called to be a traditional pastor – in the shepherd sense of the word. My gift of mercy is too low for this and I tend to do more damage than good. A friend sent me a link to an intriguing article that helped me to see a potential role as a poet – an artist who helps bridge the gap between truth and reality.
I actually see great potential for this role, however, my strengths are not well suited for this. I love ideas, I love to write, and when I have the energy, I love to speak to groups of people. However, I have a high need to see results. It isn’t easy for me to sit back and wait for things to happen. So, I’ve been thinking.
Well, in addition to moping, sulking, and grieving, I’ve been thinking. I may have even been doing some denial, bargaining, and anger. But, I’ve been thinking – I’m nothing if I’m not introspective. Ok, I’ve also been doing some insomnia and depression – but that’s all – some bad eating habits, some insomnia, and some sulking – but that’s it. Really! All of that, and some thinking.
In the midst of all this thinking, I’ve had a couple of crucial conversations. One person was seeking to change me – to fix me, if you will. The other was seeking to enlighten me to the realities. Though both conversations were intense, and both had relatively good outcomes, I was left more hopeless after each one.
“Hopeless?” You ask, “Why?”
I’m glad you asked. I’m beginning to see more clearly the absolute desperate state of the Church in Western Society. I’ve known that our culture has moved beyond Christianity as a belief structure that is relevant – let alone attractive. We are a post-christian society. I know that. But, I’m coming to the conclusion that even our churches have given up on the beliefs and practices of Jesus Christ.
“What!?”
Yes, the church is good. We are moral, we are good – to a fault. We do the right things, but we don’t necessarily do things right. We have “the form of godliness, but we are denying the power” of God. It really is no wonder that people see the church as irrelevant. It is irrelevant to me, and I’m one of their leaders.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I am a friend of God. I am a follower of Jesus. I take the Bible to be the inspired Word of God. I believe the Church is called to represent Him on this world. I have no doubts about who is my Creator, Savior, and Salvation. I just don’t think the church, for the most part, is representing our mandate very well. That doesn’t mean that we don’t do a lot of things well. That doesn’t mean that we aren’t a good refuge for families, the disenfranchised, and others. But, we have ceased to be a viable force in the lives of people – in the church and out.
What I’m talking about is greatness, or the lack thereof. We have sacrificed greatness for the merely good. We have good intentions, but you know where that road leads…
I look around and I am struck by the fact that we have no young adults in our churches. When kids get their freedom (ie; Drivers’ License), they start finding alternatives to church. Many remain absent until they get out of school, get married, and have their own kids. People start returning to church around the age of 30 (give or take).
I asked one of my friends (which was also one of the crucial conversations I mentioned above), if he thought the church was attractive to his kids (ages 20 & 22). He said no. I asked him if he thought the church was relevant to his kids. He said yes – but then he launched into a long explanation of why it was his kids’ fault that they didn’t come to church. It was classic – “blame the victim” dogma. I’ve heard it before, wrapped around a thousand stories. “We have the truth – and THEY know where to find it. All they have to do is come and get it.“
I asked my other crucial conversation friend the same basic question. “Is this the church you want your kids (4 & 7) to grow up in?” It was one of the few times in this conversation that he stumbled. “No,” he replied.
It was at this point that I began to ask my wife if we could raise our kids in this church. As we discussed it, we were afraid to pursue the question to its end. It is a scary question for those whose livelihood depends on the church that is supposed to take care of their children.
Once again, I settled into another round of insomnia, grief, and sulking – rounded out with some unproductive introspection.
I didn’t like where this question is leading me. I don’t like leading questions. Last week, it was only a matter of putting in my time until retirement. Just stick it out, lay low, and don’t make any waves for the next couple of decades. I don’t like the sound of that – but for the sake of my family, “I could stand on my head and stack BBs” (to quote my Dad). We talked about starting a small home church where we could be fed – a place that provides the spiritual community that we are created to crave.
Just about the time I was coming to accept this choice – well, that’s when the Spirit gave me Part 2 of the quandary: “Can my/our children survive this unhealthy state of affairs?”
The answer is no – in case there was any doubt.
Being a strategic and analytic thinker, my mind began to run ahead of the issue. Where will we find spiritual community then? Where will I work? How will I support my family? Where will we live? How painful is this going to be? There is also this thought: “Is God big enough to save my children, even if we live in Egypt?”
During the course of the two crucial conversations, I mentioned my employment concerns – based on the current state of the world economy. Last year, I was confident that “I” could provide for my family. This year, I’m not so sure. It was at this point that God reminded me of Goliath’s threats to the Israelites, and David’s response. “But,” I challenged, “David didn’t have a wife and kids. All he had to lose was his own life.”
It was at this point that I became desperate for God. I can’t do it. I’m not big enough, strong enough, or capable enough – not to mention, I’m not smart enough.
I am a coward – and I am thinking cowardly thoughts. So, yesterday, I turned it over to God. I lay on the couch, in sleepless anxiousness, tossing and turning, and I gave it to God. Then I slept.
As I left the house today I told my wife. “We have to fight.” We have to be smart about it, but we have to fight the complacency. We have to fight the push to put us back into our place. We have to work smarter (with God), and not harder.
I don’t want to. I don’t have the courage yet. I’m not ready. I haven’t completely come through the stages of grief. I don’t have the heart for the fight. But, in my heart, I know – we have to fight for what’s right. Not just for our kids’ sake. Not just for our sake. Not just for the sake of those who have decided that God has nothing for them. But we have to stand up for God – to be reflectors of His character. The Universe needs to see that God is not mediocre, He is not vindictive, unmerciful, uncaring, or un-hearing. He lives – and He saves.
“David said to the Philistine, ‘You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the LORD Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied. This day the LORD will hand you over to me, and I’ll strike you down and cut off your head. Today I will give the carcasses of the Philistine army to the birds of the air and the beasts of the earth, and the whole world will know that there is a God in Israel. All those gathered here will know that it is not by sword or spear that the LORD saves; for the battle is the LORD’s, and he will give all of you into our hands.’” (1 Samuel 17)
Bring Your Own Subtext
February 13, 2009 at 12:39 pm (Feedback Received, Introspection, Leadership, Musings, change) (acceptance, authority, change, cheese, Christianity, communication, community, compromise, conversation, criticism, direction, discipleship, dreams, excellence, expectations, growth, ideas, ignorance, Isolation, leaders, Leadership, management, McClaren, McManus, mediocrity, motives, moved, opportunity, pastor, people, poet, power, priest, relationships, religiosity, Rob Bell, shattered, Subtext, Transcendence, transformation, Twitter, vision, Whedon)
Today has been an interesting day of reflection and introspection.
First, I heard an interesting interview with Joss Whedon, the creator/writer of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. He coined the phrase, Bring Your Own Subtext. That phrase right there, redefined a strength I have – which has recently been labeled a weakness. I’ve been told I have untested assumptions, however, that can also be a gift.
Next, I finished reading a fascinating book excerpt on The Christian Century website. The article, Poet in residence: Listening for the sacred subtext, by M. Craig Barnes, brought a lot of things into focus. It was as if the author was articulating ideas that have been percolating in my mind for years.
I hadn’t put it into the perspective he described, but it certainly has given me much to think about.
This statement resonated with me:
“Complaining is usually a veiled lament about deeper issues of the soul. Since people are unaccustomed to exploring the mystery of their own souls, they will often work out their spiritual anxieties by attempting to rearrange something external, like a church’s music program. But it doesn’t matter how many changes they make to the environment around them. They will never succeed in finding peace for the angst of the soul until they attend directly to it. This is why people have pastors.”
I’ve known this for years – it is a part of my being, however, I tend to cut to the chase and get right to the core of the problem. My feelings has been that talking about all the issues surrounding the problem is just wasting your time, and mine. Here’s the issue, here’s the solution, “is there anything else we need to talk about?“ In fact, I had an encounter yesterday, right along those lines.
And that’s when I cam across this statement in the article:
“I am often unsure that redemption occurs in parishioners’ lives even when I do direct them to the true issue… But that [is] more truth than they [are] prepared to confess at the time. What was clear to me, though, was that unless I invited them to look beneath their complaint to their personal loss, I would only be part of the distraction that was keeping them from ever finding healing for their hurt.”
This is where Barnes shows real skill in his writing – and thinking. He doesn’t take short cuts (like I tend to do) – he takes his time and lays out the issue. In the scenario he’s referring to above, I would have just told them what the issue was, and told them to fix it. But, as he says, this is more truth than most people are able to handle. When I’ve done this in the past, I’ve been amazed by their continued lack of progress in the area of concern. I now see more clearly, that if they couldn’t handle the truth, they won’t even be able to hear it.
I’m dealing with several situations right now that are similar to the situation that Barnes writes about. Unfortunately, I don’t possess the skill sets of compassion or patience that enable me to wait for these conversations to unfold.
I’ll let you read the article for yourself, but there were several key thoughts that leaped out at me. He talked about the various roles of the pastor (i.e. priest, shepherd, administrator, leader, etc.), but what he proposes is that the pastor becomes a poet – or an interpreter of the truth and a bridge from reality to truth. This leaped out at me and struck me as something I’d like to become.
I have seen a couple of models for this sort of pastor/poet: Rob Bell, Erwin McManus, and Brian McClaren. Each of these men, while well versed in the word, are able to lead people into a new understanding of truth – even from well-known scriptures. Chuck Swindoll is also able to unpack the word in ways I never have seen. None of these men seem to focus on organizational/leadership issues, they just move ahead – and because of their skill in unpacking the Word, people follow – and people step in to organize the flock that follows.
Later in the day yesterday, I stumbled upon this article – which was an analysis and review of a presentation Rob Bell made at the National Pastor’s Convention. Live from NPC: Rob Bell, Paper cuts, forgiveness, and chocolate covered turds. Several statements really struck me, some from this blog post, and others from live Tweets. One was that “pastors are not ecclesiastical punching bags.” Oh, how many times do I feel that people feel like they can say, or do whatever they want towards me, because I get paid to be their friend, and I can’t rebel because I would lose my position.
It’s like, I have to be their friend, because that’s what pastors do – they friend everyone. Also, because we are supposed to “be like Jesus” we have to just take it. Bell offers some unique insight on how to receive and process these millions of paper-cuts. None of them fatal, but nonetheless, they will destroy.
Finally, I share with you a blog, and post, I stumbled across last week. The more I read of this man’s blog, the more convinced I became that he and I were walking similar journeys. His post, Go, or Get Dragged!, dealing with the challenges of orthodoxy, really pushed some buttons in my soul. From the quote and his post, I now more clearly see why I get so much heat when I step out of the box. The problem is, I really don’t know where the box is.
I now see why some people are so anxious about my attempts to step out of the status quo – or even explore other possibilities. I think they forget that Jesus was not orthodox either. And I can’t forget that it was the religious leaders that killed Jesus.
But, the final revelation I had was after I got home last night and read some of the comments to the post on Rob Bell’s talk. One quoted a Bell podcast:
“In a Neue podcast in October, Bell shared that his wife had helped him to see that by creating a church that is different from other churches he was tacitly criticizing others. He was picking a fight. I think this realization was a real turning point for him in realizing he had unconsciously or consciously “started it.” I think he has felt humbled and chastened since.”
As I processed this comment, I realized that basically, when I suggest a new way of doing things, I am “tacitly criticizing others.” I started the push-back, now didn’t I? That great theologian, Sir Isaac Newton taught us that “for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.“
Now, all I have to do is develop a new subtext, within a broken orthodoxy that refuses to see it’s brokenness – all without getting killed or maimed. Shouldn’t be too hard, should it?
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